A brief history of a sober storyteller

There wasn’t really anything abnormal about my childhood. I grew up in Ipswich in a middle-class home. My parents were both teachers, we weren’t rich, we weren’t poor. I went to watch Ipswich Town play, I took part in sports, I was reasonably successful at school, I had friends and yet, for some reason, I always knew there was something about me that wasn’t like the other children of my age. I was secretly anxious, afraid and didn’t feel like I belonged.

As a teenager I began to drink and take drugs with my friends. There is nothing out of the ordinary about that but the way I drank and used was different. I could never have enough and for me, alcohol and drugs seemed to solve my problems. I felt like I fitted in, was better looking, could dance and, most importantly, my fear and anxiety left me. I passed my exams and went to university, thinking that it was time to knuckle down and stop getting drunk and high. The opposite happened. I qualified as a teacher and moved back to Ipswich thinking the same. The opposite happened. When I was 29, my first son was born and I swore off alcohol for good. Once again, the opposite happened.

I continued to drink, take drugs and self-harm for the next 8 years. Trapped in the terrifying prison of addiction and resigned to the fact that when my time came, I would die early or either a miserable alcoholic death or suicide. I found myself in a residential rehab in 2018 and after several more relapses and brushes with death, I found recovery on the 30th December 2018. This is the bare bones of my story. I don’t believe that everyone who drinks and takes drugs will end up in the same mess I did but some will and even more will find themselves in a position where they are close to someone going through what I went through.

My message is that recovery is possible and if, on this crazy journey of sobriety, I can help one other person find recovery through the seeds I sew wherever I go, then this work is a success. None of the pain will be wasted and my past will become my greatest asset I wish to be an open, accessible and living example that recovery is not only possible, but so is living a life beyond your wildest dreams no matter where you’ve come from and where you are right now.